heaven

dido's on her pyre and i'm
singing in the dark. won't
you take me and make me
somehow better, somehow real?

i want to evaporate. she's
gone incandescent, a vision of
orange and red feathers, a golden
skeleton of beauty rising ever
higher, into the night sky.
the marks on my skin have
faded and without them

(i don't remember. i don't know what i am
anymore)

could i look for myself in the
nests of birds and the screams of
vulpine creatures? dear spectator,
this is all you have, a lost girl
searching for a hopeless never-land and
some queen burning her way
across eternity. do we
terrify you? or do you want
us like you've never
wanted anything?
are we your treasure,
your pearl? do you wake with
the taste of her on your lips?

one day i will burn too. one
day i will have become
it, the object at the end of
desire and maybe you'll be able to stand me then.

one day i will fly.