dark

i will learn until i am so
normal that the sight of me makes you sick.
it's what you wanted after all
order, order making me choke, the dead leaf
smoke from the fires of your discipline, until i
am so supple that you can bend and bend me
until i am something else
(because it's what you wanted)

there is something so insidious in what we
have, something rotten and corrupted at its core.
you are a blue winged electric angel and i
am your sacrifice to the mud and to the tar, to the
silty darkness and silence. toxin your
reservoir baby, toss me in and let me
decay and creep into your water so that
i am a part of you the way i never was
before. let me curl up into the
too small space around your heart and
regulate your heartbeat so that it buzzes
like a hummingbird at even the suggestion of me.

xxxxx

i'll pour my soul out and move away and
you'll cut your hair and find a boyish girl and we'll
forget that there was ever an anything, a dark
dirt after taste or poisoned water supply.
forget tears and recriminations

all we can do is keep breathing